Hello there! My name is Dr. Hemisha Patel Urgola, and I am a Licensed Clinical Psychologist in the State of New Jersey. I am also a PsyPact Authorized Provider, which allows me to provide telehealth services to residents of 30+ states.  I hold a specialized Master’s Degree in Forensic Psychology (2002; John Jay College of Criminal Justice) and a Doctorate in Clinical Psychology (2011; La Salle University).  Through my professional training and experiences, over the last 20+ years, I have been fortunate enough to work across a wide context of settings, including high schools; outpatient mental health clinics; inpatient hospitals; prisons/correctional facilities; and university settings.  Currently, I work out of my private practice full-time and specialize in the treatment of anxiety, depression, trauma, cultural issues, and couples work.  For leisure, I enjoy spending time with my family; running/strength training; watching/reading anything related to true crime; celebrating my South Asian culture; and exploring new restaurants!

Philosophy & Treatment Approach

In all aspects of my clinical work, I rely on the use of evidence-based treatments.  In simpler words, this refers to psychological treatment approaches that have been proven to be effective through research and science in treating various psychological disorders.  Science + Psychology?? Some of you may wonder how the two even go together. Take a second and think about it from a medical perspective.  If you went to see your primary care physician for a stomachache, you would probably want her to treat you with medication that has been shown to be effective in treating stomach pains.  Not some medication that only works sometimes or is actually meant to treat headaches.  The same principle applies with your therapy sessions.  They should work.  Period.  Your time and money are valuable.  It is my responsibility to not only give you space to talk and process your concerns, but to also help you develop new ways of thinking (or maybe even “unthinking”) and relate this to the issues that are causing you distress.  This way, not only will you feel some relief in the moment, but you will be better prepared in addressing similar problems if they should arise again in the future.

I consider myself an Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT, pronounced as one word) Therapist.  ACT is a part of the new “wave” of psychological treatments that focuses on helping clients change the relationship with their thoughts and feelings, while also helping them simultaneously pursue valued living.  My favorite way to teach clients about ACT is through the “Tug-of-War” metaphor.  Imagine you are stuck in a tug-of-war with some “Monster” on the other side of the rope.  This “Monster” can represent the suffering that is bringing you into therapy- maybe it represents your anxiety, depression, or trauma.  There is a deep pit in between you and the “Monster.”  You have spent a significant amount of time and effort trying to get rid of  your “Monster” – your hands are firmly on the rope and your feet are planted on the ground.  You are not going to move away from this rope.   You don’t want to think about your anxiety; you don’t want to feel sad and depressed; or you don’t want to be triggered by memories of your trauma.  All you know is that you need to make this “Monster” go away quickly.  Meanwhile, life is going on around you.  All the things that you value keep moving forward without you because you are stuck in this tug-of-war.  What if, as your therapist, I asked you to “drop the rope?”  What if I said leave the rope alone, let the “Monster” be there, walk away from him and, instead, walk towards the things that matter and allow you to create a meaningful life for yourself?  This would mean learning to co-exist with your “Monster.”  In other words, recognizing that you may feel anxious, depressed, or triggered every now and then; uncomfortable thoughts and feelings are a natural part of life.  But, that therapy can teach you how to co-exist with your “Monster” through the use of mindfulness, awareness of your feelings and thoughts, and learning to not over-connect with your inner experiences

With regard to couples therapy, I rely on my training in the Gottman Method and infuse ACT principles. The Gottman Method is based on the work of Drs. John & Julie Gottman, who have studied couples for over 40 years.  In this therapy approach, the goals are to “disarm conflicting verbal communication; increase intimacy, respect, and affection; remove barriers that create a feeling of stagnancy; and create a heightened sense of empathy and understanding within the context of the relationship.”  ACT naturally lends itself to these goals, and it will help us understand how certain processes in the relationship may “drain” the intimacy between you and your partner and how, instead, we can approach our partner with “love.”